Soooo... Bluuurrrrr....

Lately,so many things happen to me.. I got arguing with my mum.. My father in law got sick.. And my son got bitten by bees.. Now my little girl also got fever.. So many happen until i become blank now.. Blurr.. Dunno what to write down in here.. Actually,there is a lot I want to share in here.. But never mind.. Maybe on my next post lah.. Huhuhuuu..

What exactly I need in my life?

So long didn't post anything to my blog.. Damn miss you blogger.. You are my place share what inside my heart.. These few month i not write anything in here.. Many things happen and i just keep it deep inside my heart until it become full and one day it will explode.. Hard to write it in here because too many things happen and it was uncounted.. All i can say.. What exactly i need in my life?..

I was stuck in the middle and it make me so hard to breathe and feels like want to DIE.. But i know.. Everything that comes to me has it own reason.. Maybe the tested that GOD had been gave to me has it own happy ending.. I hope so.. Really really hope so.. I love both.. And I know they loved me.. But they both never gave me a chances to create my own destiny..

what should i do now?

Lately..

my relationship with my hubby is quite different now..duno whre its wrong..

these few days i keep thinking about our marriage..

should i ended it now or cOntinued it..

aCtuaLLy i dun wan be Like ceRtaIn peOpLe tat marrIed at young ages n divorced at young ages too..

if ALLAH wiLL it..

i wan my marriage stand untiL my Last breath..

but..

i duno wat on my hubby mind..

is he thinking same Like wat i'm thinking now??

Lately we owez quarreL even juz 4 a smaLL things..

n i keep offended wif wat he say..

he never care about my feeLing..

he never care about my health..

he never care everything about me..

hurmmm....

WHAT SHOULD I DO KNOW??

bLurrrRRRR...

wRote dis note on saTurday..11:57 a.m..
Like wat i wrote on my titLe..bLurRr..tat was my feeLing rite now..
Last nite..agaIn..being Lecture by my mum..
about the same thIng again n again..
but she do added 1 thing pula..
so rite now.. aLL i can say now is..
to my dearest frenz..pLease be honest wif me..
are u guys jijik or uncomfortabLe when at my home???
pLease..be honest wif me..i need to know..
or else..later bukan lagi 'will become'..
but oerdy crazy rite now..

become crazy now

rite now being lecture by my mum..so stressed..so..so..so..STRESSED!!!please help me to face dis problems..my mum think i din think about wat she said..i do think..but please let handle it by myself..

no need to remind me all the time..i knw my hubby very well..i knw his problems..i knw my in law family very well..so please..please mum..let me handle my marriage on my own way..

dun compare me wif others tat old enough to tk responsibility of their marriage..u cn see in wat age they got marrid..n so do me..

please im begging u..let me handle it..or i will become crazy if u still doing dis to me..

pLease Let me rEst 4 a whiLe..

wrote dis note on tuesday..01.00 a.m. in the mOrning..cnt sLeep..juz now being Lecture by my mum aBout my maRRiage..so sTress tahap gaban..honestLy wat my mum said is tRue..

but she knw tat now me in 'pantang'..but stiLL wan to Lecture me..sumtimes i do think to suRRender 4 dis maRRiage..but when think it bk..i knw tat i cnt surrender juz Like tat..

reaLLy need sum1 to taLk or getting advise b4 i reaLLy2 bcome cRazy..but too scaRed to Let others knw about my problems..

OH GOD!!REALLY NEEDED SUM1 TO BE TRUSTED..

sOooo FuNnyyyy..

onLy now i got cHance to upLoad my LoveLy pRincess pic..Line was not gud to upLoad pic LoL..

now wrote dis bLog at 1:06 a.m in the mOrning..cnt trust the admin time..so do the date..nw 16/01/2011 oRedy..hahahaaa...

to my dearest frenz..hidayah amir..tq La coz visit me tadi petang..hahahaaa..sori coz hidang juz a cup of cOffee saja..beLum gaji lagi..i knw u wiLL read dis..tats y i said Like tat..

back to the topic..tadi maLam..i was sitting at sofa whiLe seeing beautifuL cooking season 2 whn suddenLy i saw bees at my house..aRRRRghhhhh!!!

then i ask my mum to kiLL 'them'..funny thing is..my mum oso scared to tat bees..ada 6 ekor semua..apaLagi..i n my mum run out of my house bcoz the bees kejar us..hahahaaaa...

we wait at outside Lama juga..suddenLy i heard my mum in Law voice at 2nd fLoor..apaLagi i pun go there n ask my bapa in Law to kiLL them..n finaLLythe bees pun mati..

u r My hero father..

Lets see

my hubby bk home oredy..but untiL nw stiLL not taLking wif me..

i dunno y..i too din taLk to him untiL his de 1 who taLk 1st..

LateLy our reLationshIp is..dunno wat to say..dun wan to taLk about it..

cos whn thinking of it cn make me 'kambu' in maLay words..

rite nw im on diet..need to Lose my weigHt in many2x kiLo's..hahahaaa

wIsh me Luck..miSS my b4 maRRied body..huhuhuu

meEting hIm back..

Last nite i had a chat wif sum1..

aCctuaLLy he was my puPPy Luv whn at secandaRy schooL..

but cnt say he was my pUppy Luv..

coz im de 1 who Like him at tat time..

n i dunno wat his feeLing about me..

whn he bcome my frenz on fb..

i dunno..dun rmmber..

cnt say his name..Later sum1 wiLL knw..

Lagipun..we r juz frenz nw..

whn think about him..

i feeL so funny..

Like 'perIgi menCari timba' LoL..

i wrote a Letter n say tat i Like him..

but he never repLy my Letter..

onLy nw he taLk to me sInce form 2..

hahahahaaa..tats y thinking of it..

aLL i cn say..SO FUNNY LOL..

~~nEw yeaR..nEw Life..~~

i hope its not too late 4 me to wish haPPy new yEar..
hope this year wiLL become a great year 4 me..
no moRe sadneSs..
juz a haPPiness..
4 information..i oredy gv birth on 29/12/2010..
its a baby gurL..now i hv a pair of chiLd..
if can..no need to pregnant anymoRe..
hahahaha..
now in berpantang mOod..
aLL things tat i Like i cnt eat it 4 a whiLe..
damn miSS aLL mY fav fOod..
huhuhuhu..